Saturday, January 7, 2012
My husband filed a false PFA, had me evicted, is living in our home, with our 3 kids, and now i am homeless...?
...what should I do? I am a stay home mother of 4. I quit my job of almost 10 years to stay home with my 4 children about 1 1/2 years ago when my youngest was born. Thru 5 years of marriage, I have been thru a lot. Four years ago I had an affair. Felt very guilty for years (and he made me feel guilty then would tell me that i'm not sorry at all). He said he forgave me but I did not realized that calling people dirty names was a sign of forgiveness. We even had another child after the affair. Every time I walked out the door I could not go alone or at all because he would "tell" me where he "knew" i was going. He would say things to the point where most times i would decide not to go (even if it was the supermarket). This already manipulative man did everything that he could to drive me out of the marital home. Instead I moved into a separate bedroom of the house, to stay close to the kids and focus on my online business. A few weeks later he filed for an at fault divorce, claiming adultry & requesting full custody of the kids. He then (days later) came to me "trying" to discuss all the things he "did right" to make this relationship work (and it was full of lies). He had audio&video taped me in the past without my permission so I wasn't sure what was going on. I believe he realized how expensive it would be for a divorce and did not want to have to pay me. Many times he tried to break into my room (not sure how many times he got in). Many times he admittingly listen at my door at night after everyone else was asleep. After all of the drama, arguing, stress, and sleepless nights, I fell asleep on the toilet one night with only the wall holding me up. That night my husband came up to my room and went thru my things and took a pic of me on the toilet (and he told me about it). Going accross the hall to the bathroom I did not think to lock the door (3:30am). He found a small amount of marijuana was hidden in a box in my desk and put it back. I began smoking a little bit at night in my room about 2 weeks prior so that I could sleep (and cause he was driving me nuts!). That was probably the worst mistake ever. Over a week later, my husband came home from work at lunchtime, shouting explisives about me and all kinds of horrible things. It was so bad that i could not even finish getting the baby's coat on before i had to leave the house. He shouted something about getting a private investigator and slammed the door. I went to the store 2 min down the street and got a phone call from him as soon as i walked in the door. He said "your smoking marijuana in my house, I'm calling the cops." I turned around and immediately went home. He didn't even call them until i walked thru the door. When the cops arrived, he led them right to a box that was empty (i took it out). After full cooperation with the cops they arrested me and took me in for 6 hours. 6 hours of time that my husband had to go thru my computer and the rest of my room. i finally came home from jail and immediately went to the shower to get clean. I told the girls i would see them after. 20 min later i was done and the house was extremely quiet. He took my kids and would not answer the phone. I did not even have the chance to hug my baby or say goodbye. I called the cops, they did nothing. I layed in bed for 2 full days crying my eyes out feeling absolutely helpless. I am now still going thru this mess and i have been homeless off and on for months. I smoke a few marijuana joints and get EVERYTHING taken from me due to my husband filing a PFA stating "i threatened his life because she said she would have her new boyfriend beat me up." What a joke. He physically, verbally, emotionally, & mentally abused me for years. What can I do?
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